Did you know....?

I love history (I could watch the History Channel around the clock, except for Law & Order re-runs). Here are a few interesting facts about Chinese history:

Chinese Emperor Shi Huang-Ti built a network of 270 palaces, linked by tunnels, and was ao afraid of assassination that he slept in a different palace each night.

A terracotta army of six thousand men and horses was buried with Shi Huang-Ti, China's first emperor, at Xianyang.

The purpose of the Great Wall of China, the monumental fortification separating China from Mongolia, was not especially to keep out the Huns from the north. The Huns could easily find places along the stretch that they could scale with ladders. But they couldn't get their horses across. Without their horses, they weren't very effective warriors.

Paper was invented in China around 105 A.D., by the eunuch Ts'ai Lun. According to the official history of the Han dynasty (3rd century A.D.), Ts'ai Lun was given an aristocratic title after he presented Emperor Ho Ti with samples of paper. In 751 A.D., Chinese papermakers were captured by the Arabs at Samarkand, and by 794 A.D. several state-owned paper mills operated in Baghdad. The Arabs were manufacturing paper in Spain around 1150. It was not until 1590 that the first English paper mill was founded, at Dartford.

The Chinese physician Hua T'o, born sometime between 140 and 150 A.D., was the first doctor known to perform surgery under general anaesthetic. The potion used to render his patients unconscious was a mixture of hemp and strong wine called ma fei san.

Fingerprinting was used in China as early as 700 A.D. (who knew it would one day be an essential component to adopting from China!)

Cheng Ho, court eunuch and great admiral of the Ming Dynasty, led Chinese fleets on seven voyages of conquest and diplomacy, between 1405 and 1433. As a result of Cheng Ho's voyages, which ranged as far as West Africa, 36 countries sent tribute to China. However, in 1433, the eunuchs' opponents gained the upper hand in a power struggle in the Chinese court, and the fleets stopped, shipyards were dismantled, and outbound shipping was forbidden. Had these voyages continued, it is possible that the Chinese would have "discovered" America before Columbus.

Some nineteenth-century Chinese warlords had an interesting way of fighting their battles. The rivals would meet in a tent and have an elaborate tea ceremony, during which each leader would drop hints at to the size of his army, the size and firepower of his weapons, and his chances of victory. Then the two would balance accounts, with one usually admitting that, because his enemy was stronger and deserved the victory, that he himself would accept the role of loser and pay reparations. The two armies then went their separate ways without loss of life. (Hmmmm, perhaps modern politicians should take a cue from the past).

You can read other tidbits at this website.

Just for fun...

I saw this on Jen's blog and thought it was fun. It's random words from my blog all combined together. You can get one for your blog at the Snap Shirts website and have it put on a tee shirt. Cute, huh?

Courtesy of my cyber-buddy Tian, this is Kavanna's name in Chinese, written in five different styles. There is no "v" sound in Chinese so the name is translated with a "w". The characters mean triumph, hope and elegant. Those meanings resonate in so many ways. Thank you, Tian!

Recommended Reading...

I recommend "Yell-Oh Girls", an anthology about growing up Asian and female, edited by Vickie Tam. Something to read during the wait!

There is also an interesting New York Times article about international adoption, "Adopted In China, Seeking Identity In America" about some of the first adoptees, their views on culture, assimilation, and what it's like to be adopted into a family who's racially different.

Waiting Families

My heart goes out to the families with a May 31st LID. In January the CCAA sent referrals for dossiers logged in through mid-May 2005. The next batch matched through May 25th. Now they have matched only five days, May 26th through May 30th. It will take another month for the May 31st people to get their referrals. Yes, the CCAA will take four months to match one month of dossiers. I can't imagine how torturous this must feel to the May 31st families. Sending you sympathy, support and cyber-hugs...

Part of the hold-up may be the huge number of dossiers received in March, as a result of Oprah's show on Chinese adoption several months earlier. It's also rumored that the Hunan baby trafficking scandal caused officials give closer scrutiny to the babies' documentation. I'm very grateful to the CCAA for the care and attention to detail they give this process. I just wish they'd go faster!!

For the rest of us, this latest development means probably coming to terms with waiting until next year for our babies. The waiting period is 10-11 months as of right now, and will probably continue to lengthen (it was 6 months when we started this process!). It's likely that we won't get Kavanna for over a year (ugh, I hate even writing that).

I'm trying to keep a positive outlook and tell myself all the "right" things:

*It will happen when it's meant to happen (okay, what does that even mean??)

*The wait will disappear when we finally have Kavanna (people told me that I'd forget about the pain of childbirth, too; ha!!!)

*There's nothing we can do but make the best of it (yeah, I rationally get that but I also I hate feeling so powerless and helpless).

*Blah, blah, blah.

Anyone else out there feeling the same? What's the best way to get through this wait? What are you planning to do with your time? Leave a comment with any thoughts...

Lost In Translation

Funny article in the New York Times about a website that reveals how Chinese tattooos are not, shall we say, exactly accurate. For example, Britney Spears has a tattoo that she thought meant "mysterious" and it turnbs out it means "odd" or "strange". Great site run by Tian Tang that's definitely worth checking out!

Twelve years from now...

In twelve years our adorable babies will be doing stuff like this. That's Ariel (on the left) and her friend Stephanie rehearsing for a skit on Alexander the Great. They're making the most of their sugar highs (chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast) and having fun. They're so cute. I even forgive them for waking me up at 6:45am on a Saturday morning!

Optimism

Thank you to friends old and new for the kind comments and emails regarding yesterday... Today is a new and better day and I'm filled with a sense of optimism about the future. We are so blessed in many different ways. We have much to look forward to in the coming year, and much to appreciate in the moment!!

A Sad Day...

March 14, 2006 was our due date. Part of me mourns our loss and feels sad for what might have been, for the precious life we had so briefly and then lost. The moment when we saw that terrible stillness on the ultrasound was the worst experience of my life and David's. Yet everything we went through brought us to where we are today, focusing on the future, not the past. We didn't know it at the time but that terrible day was the first step on this journey to Kavanna. Today is difficult but it will bring us closer to tomorrow... and to our daughter in China.

Rumors!!

Rumor: 1. a story in general circulation without confirmation or certainty as to facts. 2. common hearsay

Lately I cannot get enough of adoption rumors. Every time I turn on the computer and eagerly check my sources (various yahoo groups, the MSN Adopting from China website and the China Adoption Forums). I'm like a bloodhound searching for a scent... a pig nosing for truffles in some muddy French field... you get the idea. Hmmm, perhaps I should use a more compelling metaphor. Okay, here goes: I'm like Carrie from Sex And The City trying to find a Manolo Blahnik sale. Or a decent guy. But I digress....

Yes, I am obsessed with the latest rumors, specifically those that pertain to referrals. Recently I found a new blogsite that fuels my addiction. It's called In Search Of Rumors and it's as addictive as chocolate. I can always find something to add to my preoccupation. Will the wait extend to 18 months, as a Swedish agency has reported? Or will it speed up again, as others are predicting? Only time will tell.

In the meantime, all we have are rumors. Heard anything lately????

Log In Date!!!

Dear GWCA Family,

We are happy to report that your dossier was registered in China on February 6, 2006. You are a member of the February 2006 LID Group. If we receive any additional information we will contact you as quickly as possible. In the meantime, if you need assistance or support, please feel free to give us a call.

Congratulations,

Great Wall China Adoption


When a child is born, an invisible red thread reaches out from the child’s spirit and connects to all important people who will enter the child’s life. As the child grows, the threads shorten, bringing closer those people who are destined to be together. ~Chinese Proverb~

This is my attempt to attach a picture to our profile. You'd think that someone with a post-graduate degree and a reasonable level of intelligence would be able to accomplish this task with relative ease. But no... so far this attempt has entailed a crash course (self-taught) in photo cropping, learning kilobyte size of photos, and editing. Probably a ten year old kid could do this without a problem. Here goes...

Blankets!

Ariel's blanket

Kavanna's blanket...

When I was a toddler my favorite object was a beloved "blankee". It started out being a pretty patterned large piece of soft cloth... a few years and many washings later it was a faded, very soft cloth with little discernible pattern, and I loved it. Recently I discovered these beautiful blankets at Graceful Kate Designs and got one for both my girls (weird to say that, since one of my girls seems so far away, geographically and timewise, but I know she's there). They are beautiful satin on one side and very snuggly soft on the other. Not only that, this company donates ten percent of each purchase (of the Chinese adoption blankets) to Half The Sky .

Secret Pal

There was also a cool poster of dogs, but the photograph was upside down and I couldn't rotate it (I can be technologically challenged, thank you very much!). Receiving these gifts made met feel really good. Oddly, it gave me the real sense that we're not alone in this journey. Of course, I know this rationally, but I didn't feel as connected to the adoption community until the secret pal gift arrived! Thank you, Secret Pal! You're the best!

February 22, 2004

Two years ago David and I were married in a gorgeous ceremony that celebrated and affirmed our love and our family. We incorporated a blessing that united us all as a family, so that Ariel knew that our wedding was not just about uniting David and me as a couple, but about celebrating our new family. Happy Anniversary to all of us!! (when my scanner works I'll upload a wedding photo but in the meantime, this is us after two years of bliss!)

Questions

Where is our LID (Log In Date)? What date is our LID? When will we get our LID? Has Kavanna been born yet? Will we get twins? How long is the wait? When will we travel to China? What will Kavanna be like? What will she look like? How will Ariel adjust to being a big sister? Do they sell Huggies in China? What should we bring on the trip? Why does the Chinese goverment insist on new crisp $100 bills? Why doesn't our bank carry them? Where are all the new bills, anyway? When should we start getting our shots? When should we buy a crib? What kind of stroller is best? When will referrals come? How long will we wait? Where is our LID??????

Great Wall Of China

The Great Wall Of China (not to be confused with our wonderful agency, Great Wall China Adoption) is 4500 miles long, the biggest man-made structure in the world. It can be seen from outer space. Amazingly, construction began about 2200 years ago. At a pace of 10 miles per day, it would take about 15 months to walk the entire length of the wall... which, ironically, is about the time our journey to Kavanna will take us, assuming a 10 month post DTC wait and another two months before we travel. We started this journey in September 2005 and hope to be in China in December 2006. This might be overly optimistic but our fingers are crossed.

A few days ago I dreamed that we were in China with Kavanna. In the dream, I was ecstatic and joyful beyond belief. I then turned away for a moment and in that split second she was gone... I searched frantically and finally located her in the hallway, sticking her finger into an electrical outlet ... I woke up (heart pounding) and looked around our house. And that's when I realized: why, we live in a death trap! Electrical hazards abound. Dangerous and deadly plants are everwhere. The skillet atop our stove is even a hazard (one pull on the handle and bam). So, let the babyproofing begin!

According to the U.S. government, about 2.5 million children are injured (or worse) due to safety hazards in the home. The government recommendations include:

SAFETY LATCHES AND GATES for cabinets and drawers in the kitchen and bathrooms.

SAFETY GATES to prevent falls down the stairs

DOOR KNOBS AND DOOR LOCKS to prevent kids from entering a room where they might find hazards, including doors that lead to the backyard, especially if you have a pool.

ANTI-SCALDING DEVICES for faucets and showers. Set your water temperature to 120 degrees to prevent accidental scalding.

OUTLET COVERS AND OUTLET PLATES to prevent electrocution.

CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTORS should be placed outside bedrooms.

CUT WINDOW CORDS AND USE CORD STOPS to prevent strangling.

DOOR STOPS AND DOOR HOLDERS can prevent accidental smooshing of fingers and hands.

This is scary stuff but a little precaution goes a long way.

Letter to Kavanna

给Kavanna 的信件

Dear Kavanna,

I don’t know where you are right now, but sooner or later you’ll be home with us. In a sense, you’re going to be born twice. Not born again in the religious sense, but in your short life you will experience two completely different worlds and step from one life into another.

Your first birth will be in China… you’ll spend the first months of your life in an orphanage or a foster home. If it’s an orphanage, you’ll likely be surrounded by dozens of other children and grow accustomed to the din of voices raised in laughter, delight or protest. You’ll probably never leave the orphanage grounds. You may never ride in a car or see a dog or a park. If you’re in a foster home, you’ll probably experience what it’s like to be part of a family. Either way, I hope your caretakers give you lots of love and hugs and kisses. I hope you feel loved and safe and secure. I hope you get enough food to eat and that you’re warm enough and happy.

Your second birth will also be in China… it will start as soon as you meet me and Ariel and David, also known as mama and pei pei (big sister) and baba (daddy). I can’t imagine how it will feel to be ripped from the life you know and be placed in the arms of strangers. My hope is that with each passing minute, hour and day, we’ll become less like strangers to each other and more familiar... until we feel like family. You’ll come home to a vastly different world, with lots of space and all kinds of new people and creatures - like Roy-Boy and our extremely shy hermit crab, plus the bunny-rabbit family who feasts on our grass, and the ducks and turtles who live at the lake.

Our journey to you is taking longer than we’d like, but we know eventually we’ll be united. Then a new journey will begin for all of us. We are so excited to start a life with you! Your grandparents can’t wait to welcome you and either can all our friends.

Wherever you are, you’re already in our thoughts and our hearts.

Love, from your forever family—
Mommy, Daddy, and Ariel
P.S. If we are referred twins, this letter is to Mikayla, too!

Chinese New Year!!

Last night we joined hundreds of other FCC Families (Families with Children from China) at the Empress Restaurant in Chinatown for a Chinese New Year celebration feast. What an experience. Food! Entertainment! Lion Dancers! Magicians! And hundreds of shining, happy faces, both daughters and parents, sharing the experience, united by love. It hardly seems possible that we will be one of those families, soon.