Saturday, October 08, 2005

Why China?

That's the first question most people ask when we share our plans to adopt a baby girl (or girls, since we're requesting twins!) from China. There are no simple answers to that question. One reason is that babies from China are generally very well-cared-for, and healthy. Drug and alcohol use is almost unheard-of in Chinese women, and most babies are born to married women who take good care of themselves while pregnant. Many orphanages have high ratios of nannies to children, and there are fewer attachment issues in children adopted from China than from other parts of the world.

There are also many resources available to families who adopt from China. Families with Children From China (www.fwcc.org) has chapters all over the country. They provide social and educational opportunities, so that the children have a chance to see other families who look like theirs, to learn about their culture of birth, and more. I don't know what it will be like for Kavanna to be part of a family that is multi-racial. I imagine it might be odd for her to have a blonde, blue-eyed sister, for instance. Thanks to FCC, she'll meet others facing similar issues. Our hope is that she will feel less isolated and more connected to our family and our community given that kind of structured support (and our love, of course!).

That's part of the reason we're adopting from China. The real reason lies in our hearts... After seeing National Geographic's The Lost Girls of China and watching GWCA's informational DVD, we felt drawn to those little faces in a way we cannot really understand or describe. We chose China because those babies touched something inside us and the idea of bringing one or two of them home felt completely right.

There's a saying that's popular in the Chinese adoptive community. It's from an ancient Chinese proverb:

An invisible red thread connects those destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break.

I've always been too pragmatic to believe in destiny (I'll make my own destiny, thank you very much!!) but maybe there's something to it, after all. The other day I realized the kabala bracelet I wear is... a red thread.

Why China? For all these reasons and more we have yet to discover...

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